Decisions....

So last year at this at pretty much this exact same time I began having to make decisions about schooling... I debated for 3 months between BYU and SUU, UVU was there too but I only debated with it for about a month. I finally made my decision just hours before the deadline was up for commitments.Well, I never wanted to have to suffer through those months of decisions again... BUT here I am :)

I made a list of pros and cons of each school last year, and it looks like I will be doing the same thing once again. This list will pretty much have the same items with a few exceptions...

.......

Do I chose one of the best programs in the state, somewhere I have my footing already, somewhere that has had some goodtimes amongst the hard ones?

Or...

Do I chose another pretty good program, a place where I can be closer to my family, a place where I will have friends by my side?

........

I don't want the social aspect to be a factor but it has to be at this point. So many people told me I would love going to school with no friends, that it would be easier for me to meet new people. Well I must have proved them wrong. It is hard with no friends, hard with no familiarity (sp?) anywhere around. It is hard to find complete trust and comfort in complete strangers. Don't get me wrong, I am so blessed for the roommates I have! We get along great and I know we will stay friends for a long time, but there is a huge difference between who has always been there for you and who is just starting to be there for you. Also, when you have a little thing that is called Socially Awkward Condition (aka SAC) then it is so hard to go out of your way to be outgoing. I have tried, and the few people I have met are great. But the key word is few. I realize going to a different school isn't going to change that but I still have hope that something can change it.

One day I think I know what I am doing with my life, but then something happens.

.........

I know I just need to trust in the Lord, that when the time comes for me to know what I need to do then I will know. But in the mean time I am just getting ancy and stressed about it all. Until that time, I just have to remain focussed on my schooling, and experiencing life as a college student. I know that whatever happens will happen for a reason. I know I was meant to go to SUU this year, I have not regretted my decision for one second. Even through the hard times I have never wondered "what if?". I have learned so much about myself and about life in general and I will continue to learn so much more no matter where I chose to finish out my degree.